Best of 09 Blog Challenge
I haven’t been keeping up with this blog challenge very well. Even though it’s late I’m posting a response to today’s prompt, which is:
“Challenge. Something that really made you grow this year. That made you go to your edge and then some. What made it the best challenge of the year for you?”
Reflecting back over the year, there were several challenges but the most challenging situation I found myself in was a not so pleasant one. I lived upstairs from my sister and brother-on-law. My sister was out of town and called me to see if I would go check on her husband because he wasn’t answering the phone. She was still on the phone when I went downstairs, taking the phone with me. When I found my brother-in-law, he has passed away. I believe the hardest thing I”ve ever had to do was tell my sister that her husband had died.
A million things went through my mind during those seconds that passed before I spoke. She was keeping her three grandchildren, one of whom was just a few months old. I worried if she would be able to care from them once she heard the news. Finally, I realized that I had to tell her because she’s on the phone waiting to talk to him. There was nothing I could say except the truth. Strangely enough, I went out into the hallway, and sort of whispered to her, “Judy, he’s dead.” I’m not sure why I was so secretive about it.
The next several hours that followed continued to be challenging. I called the police and they came soon with the paramedics. They questioned me over and over about what had happened, and informed me that it was a crime scene and would remain so until the determined what had happened. My brother-in-law was like my dad. My parents died when I was young and he and my sister basically raised me from the time I was 16. So, I was devastated that he was gone, and yet had to maintain my composure to answer their questions and make sure I did what was necessary, in my sister’s absence.
Their daughter came right away, and later that evening my sister flew back home. I knew I had to be supportive for them and did my best to have the strength I needed to help them through this tragedy. But the thought of my brother-in-law lying there wouldn’t leave my mind.
I wondered why it had happened the way it did. As the weeks passed, little answers came to me. There are many gifts that came from that event. Not the least of which was that I saw the peace on his face. I knew without a doubt that he had laid down and fallen asleep and just not awakened. I had the gift of telling that to his family. My sister felt guilt about being gone when he died. But she was able to let go of the guilt when I described to her how peaceful he looked. I knew she was imagining that he had suffered and that if she had been there, she might have been able to keep him from suffering. Being the one to give her the truth and alleviate her guilt was a huge blessing to us both.
Challenges are not something most of us welcome, but if we look for the gifts within them, they are nearly always there. I feel so honored that God chose me to be there when my brother-in-law died. I feel that he and I shared a moment that is so spiritual it can’t be explained in mere words. The hardest moment of my life turned out to be one of the most special.
