There is a song called "We Live" by Superchick.  Part of the lyrics say,

There’s a man who waits for the tests to
See if the cancer had spread yet
And now he asks why did I wait to live ’til it was time to die
If I could have the time back, how I’d live
Life is such a gift
So how does the story end?
Well, this is your story and it all depends
So don’t let it become true
Get out and do what we were meant to do

We live, we love, we forgive and never give up
Cuz the days we are given are gifts from above
And today we remember to live and to love
We live, we love, we forgive and never give up
Cuz the days we are given are gifts from above
And today we remember to live and to love

 

The message is similar to many essays, email forwards and motivation speeches we often hear.  It’s a wonderful message, but there is a problem in it that I see.  If you are not dying, and you don’t feel that your time is limited, it is unlikely that you are going to have the courage to live that way.

The thing that impending death gives people is the courage to throw caution to the wind.  Think for a moment how you’d answer the question "what are three things you’d love to do if you knew you were dying?"  Now, imagine getting up tomorrow and announcing to your spouse, sister, mother or other significant person that you intend to do those things right now!  Imagine doing this if you are not going to die.

I guess it depends on what three things you are thinking of, but if your things are like mine, that person would think you’d lost your mind.  The end of our life is when we regret playing it safe and holding back.  That’s when we’re going to go for it with all we’ve got.

And there’s a reason people don’t live like that all the time.  Let me give an example.  Someone does something mean to me.  If I just immediately tell them I forgive them, I am teaching them that it’s okay to treat me mean.  I have a future with this person.  So, I need to think about how to handle this so that our future relations are good.  Right?  But, if I’m dying, I don’t have to worry about the future.  I can say I forgive you because I do and I love them and the future doesn’t matter.

So, my point is that it is great to think about what we’d do if our time were limited.  It’s a motivator to get off our rears and really appreciate our life and the people in it.  But, if everyone lived as if they were dying, I think things would be pretty chaotic.

 

 

Filed under: Reflection