This was a visual journal type thing I made many  years ago.   It represents all the people past and present that made me who I am.  During the process of creating this collage, I realized how many people had been, and still were, in my life that weren’t helping me grow in a positive way.  Around that time, I saw a quotation that said something like, “Surround yourself with people who love you.”  I thought that was ridiculous.  To think that someone could control who was around them seemed impossible to me.

I will be 60 years old this coming Sunday. I was in my 40′s when I made that collage.  The years from then to now have afforded me some amazing opportunities to learn about myself and discover abilities that I had didn’t  realize I possessed.  Of the things I’ve learned, one of the most life-changing is that we can control the kind of people that surround us.

Since that time, I have been divorced and remarried, my kids have grown up and left home and   I’ve moved many times, including two state-to-state moves.  The people physically in my life have obviously changed but more importantly, I have chosen to nurture only those relationships that help me be who I really am. And now, as I approach my 60th birthday and the upcoming holidays, I am taking time to reflect upon who is in my life.

It is amazing that I truly am surrounded by people who love me.  There is no one in my life that brings me down, criticizes me, yells at me or demands anything of me that isn’t true to who I am.  I didn’t just wake up one day and surgically remove those people from my life.  I just sought out love and support so gradually my “tribe” shifted.  It required that I learn to believe that I’m worth loving but I did that, step by step, through writing, talking, reading and listening to loving people who offered encouragement.

It’s exciting to know that for the rest of my life, I will live in love.

Posted Reflection |